Chapter #7

Well..i have nothing to do from that moment..
Work without spirit, singing without notes, walking with no direction...and everything just getting worse
Cant stop thinking about her..even she doesnt care about me
Cant stop worry about her..even she doesnt worry about me too
Cant stop loving her even im nobody to her
i have no idea, have nothing to do..but enjoy this pain strikes me down in every single second..the most beautiful and acrobatic pain..
Maybe,for her i'm just an ugly guy who's always talked too much..a biggest joke in her life..a clown who always failed to make her laugh..a wind that blows too hard..a rain which falls everytime..or simply,the most useless thing in her life
I confess that i'm weak, powerless and awkward..
But at least i tried..tried so hard..even i've always failed..
I always be myself and never change..so the feeling inside for her too..
Even it hurts so much..even time never goes back to when we wanted to..even i have to drown in pain all the time..but thats alright..cause i think she is happier now
I step out from her life..but i'm not going anywhere..just sit back on where i used to,in the middle of nowhere..when the night has come,i lay down on the ground,looking at the moon shine down from above..
And it doesnt mean i dont love her anymore cause like what i said,i'll always love her
Why?how can i betray what i'm feeling inside..
We can hold what we feel,but we can deny or hide it..
We can go anywhere,everywhere around the world and across universe we want..but we cant find a reason to love
We can move on,but it means we lie to ourself about love that we said
We can lie to make someone that we love happy..but forgot the essential part of love too..the Honesty
We cant kill the love we have,the more we try it grows faster and bigger than the ever was
It doesnt die easily..its a living thing.. 
Its a promise..its a gift..once given,never forgotten..never be able to disappear 
Its a promise..to make someone happy..even we hurts,shattered and curled on the floor, cause where is love,there is life, happiness and pain 
We can love,in happiness or suffering in the darkest sorrow..
We can go wrong,but we will try to do the right for love..even it seems wrong too
The most beautiful love is the one without reasons 
Love is loving with two hopes : 1. To being loved by someone we love 2. To love each other all the time
Maybe i'm wrong,but thats what we need from love..to being loved by someone we love and to loving each other all the time..
This is me..the one who love someone without being loved by the one i love..who always care and worry about her even when i'm saying or doing nothing..the one who always love her................................................